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Leaf Seligman's avatar

This powerful wise post reminds me of Sarah Peyton’s line: Blame tells us what we do not want to mourn.

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Carolyn North's avatar

Thank you for this - and for you, altogether, Shilpa! Hearing again your wisdom about blaming and attacking - such familiar territory for me! - I pose to you and everyone this dilemma of the moment: How do I respond to someone whose attitude towards me, shouts out: "I'm the boss around here, and don't you forget it!" What I hear beneath the power-play is something like, "There is only room for one Queen in this Kingdom, and I am IT!"

Our cultural difference, given that we are both Caucasian women born in the US, is a religious one between Christian and Jew, both are intelligent, good hearted "leader" types, both well liked - or loved - by our friends. But we are not friends. So, the dilemma remains because she speaks in a fast manner and listens not at all; I speak slowly, and do most of the listening - in other words, how do people with different personalities and different modes of relating get past the personality barriers, even when they are from the same culture?

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